This Thanksgiving I was reflecting on our old sailing trips with family. Dad taught us how to sail. Or rather, I read alot of books down below or on the nets in the sun while my mom, dad & brother did all the hard stuff. When the sea was rough or wind strong however we all sat above deck and sailed together. When the wind was calm Dad would use terms like port and starboard, aft and stern. When the sea was rough all sailing terminology went out the window; it became right and left, front and back. It still makes me laugh.
For a few months Dave and I have been at sea, sails fluttering and flapping, reading the wind, double checking the charts. We’ve been a couple of degrees off. There have been some gusts, flutters and moments of inertia. We are learning to lean in.
During this particular voyage I’ve read or listened to a lot of books. A lot.
As I look back on the titles I realize there’s a theme. Here are my top 3 favourites.
Every once in awhile it’s good to take a break... #nobrainer right? Well maybe for you but I’ve been terrified. Terrified that stepping away would kill the drive in me I’ve carried for the last couple of years.
Afraid to pause. You know, like when you have been going so hard for so long. Running. If I stop to take a breath, will I run again?
I’ve never run this far this for this long. Just a little further, just a little more. You see I’ve never been a goal oriented runner before. I might have run or had a good idea of where I wanted to go but I was never truly attached to the outcome. If I got there it always felt a bit miraculous and the path to get there a bit haphazard.
Then a shocking realization the other day that I work for myself And no one but me is going to tell me to stop or to go for that matter.
This boss is tough... I KNOW her! She’s capable of so much and capable of not doing anything! I’ve seen her take time outs for months in the past and she can’t...
When there is something you want so bad but year after year you don’t achieve it.
For example - weight loss, 🏋🏻♂️ bigger monthly Cheques, multiple streams of income, 💰 time with family, a vacation, taking your business to the next level, 🏅 forgiving someone, something off your bucket list, better health ...
Look for your WHY! The deep why, the true why, then run at it like your life depends on it.
The old adage where there’s a WILL there’s a way is true but it’s also NOT true!! I know lots of people who have the will to quit a habit, shed some pounds, make extra money, rank adavance in their company..., I personally had the will to lose 25 pounds but for 5 years couldn’t drop the weight no matter what ( or so I told myself.) everyone told me I was in my 40s, it was my hormones, it was my metabolism, it was impossible… Then I discovered my WHY and a whole new world opened up. I got committed, got an accountability partner, ( t...
Language is a powerful thing and how we use it decides our future on a daily basis!
At this point unless you have made no contact with the outside world in some years you have heard of the power of positive thinking and positive word. In fact though some people believe this to be a newish trend the power of the word goes right back to biblical time and is taught in the bible.
Today I’m going to mention one powerful little trick that was very impactful for me when I first learnt it. I’ve taught my family the same rule and we all call each other out on it when we slip up. This word is tricky and sneaks into everyday language and self talk!
Are you shoulding me?
If you are like most people, this word inherently comes with a level of guilt and weight and a not so nice little nagging feeling. Examples?
I should work harder
I should have had dinner organized but I was so busy today
My friend Betty and I decided to go to Mexico together in November some years ago. She had her dive ticket and suggested I got mine before we went so we could do some diving together. It was really far outside of my comfort zone but I took my lessons in freezing BC waters in a dry suit, got certified and was excited and nervous to try out the warmer waters of Mexico.
We found some other experienced divers at the resort, they had organized a more expert dive in a forest of coral with a local dive guide and Betty was pretty stoked to be invited to a less touristy dive. I was also stoked but slightly nervous as I had never dived with a group, never dived in deep waters and never dived without my instructor. I was worried I would make a mistake or hold the group back.
Everyone assured me there was enough experience in the group to make up for my lack of knowledge and we were in good hands. We left first thing the next morning.
I was paired with one of our expert buddies and we...
I remember the days when a weekly check in if not daily was the norm for me and my buddies and life had a different kind of pressure and was full of a different kind of grace.
What I’ve noticed with the less constant contact is a little sneaky factor that I never noticed before. … many of us are looping.
What’s looping? Well its what my husband and I say when we get stuck on something and repeat it more that once. We laugh at ourselves, acknowledge and try to shift the loop. But from a bigger perspective I’ve notice looping can happen for years.
Some of the big goals I set for myself 5 years ago have been accomplished, I learned, earned and am still progressing. Some other goals though, some of the ones I’ve wanted quite badly (or so I thought) are on my mind on a daily, weekly, yearly, basis…
What the heck?
I’m not going to go into the why, I couldn’t even begin to tell you why after gaining some unwanted weight over 5 years ago, I have repeatedly set a goal to shed that wei...
I heard this saying a while back about being a crab in a bucket. It was regarding friendship and being aware of who you spend the most time with. Sometimes friendships can be like that. You are all in the bucket together. Then one day you figure out a way to leave the bucket and hit the deep blue. You are torn. You have grown and are excited to explore but what about your friends in the bucket? Well, when you reach out to some they may just pull you down back into the bucket, while others will take the “claw” and check out the view with you.
I have been very blessed to have some friends who have all left the bucket with me.
In fact, this weekend I am connecting with my 3 best friends from elementary school. We are all very different and have each taken different roads. From spontaneous to planned, married, unmarried, kids, step kids, no kids, one career for 15 years, 15 careers in 15 years. We are all unique and different and oddly the same. Trave...
About 10 years ago I had a good friend whom I used to meet with on a weekly basis. We would go over our goals for the week as we were both trying to get our new businesses off the ground. We created categories together and each week we would rate from a scale of 1-10 how happy we were in each category and what little thing (or big ) we could do to raise our level of happiness in each category. Every week we would meet and it would be the same. She would have achieved all of her business goals but had put almost no time into self care, slow down, spiritual connection categories, while I was doing AWESOME in the self care, bubble bath, mediation categories but never seemed to achieve my “harder” businessy goals. We would laugh and try and come up with ways for me to business up and her too chill out. I was always looking for a way to find ease with my goals and would often approach them with no rhyme or reason....
When you were just an acorn, you fought hard for the light and water to grow. Your roots began in Africa, born and raised in Kenya you spent your formative years in boarding schools, experienced wealth and then loss when everything was taken away. In your school days the teachers beat you for wrong answers on tests, you ran miles to evade school bullies, sold candy in the school yard saving a small fortune which you then gave selflessly when it was needed. Every day, every year you fought and found light to grow.
When you left school you joined the army, you became an elite paratrooper with nothing to lose, you set eyes on Mom and you knew she was the one. As the story goes you asked her out everyday for weeks until she finally out of sheer exasperation she said yes, and on that first date you said; “you are the woman I am going to marry”.
Just as you pursued Mom, you went after all your dreams relentlessly. I’m not sure you ever took no for an answer.